To see you standing in the sagging bookstore door
So filled me with chagrin that suddenly you seemed as
pink and white to me as newborn, hairless mouse. For
I had hoped to delight you at home. Be a furl
Of faint perfume and Vienna’s cord like lace,
To shine my piano till a shimmer of mother-of-pearl
Embraced it. To pleasantly surprise you with the grace
That transcends my imitation and much worn
“Louis XV” couch. To display my cathedrals and ballets.
To plunge you into Africa through my nude
Zulu Prince, my carvings from Benin, forlorn
Treasures garnered by much sacrifice of food.
I had hoped to delight you, for more
Rare than the seven-year bloom of my
Chinese spiderweb fern is a mind like yours
That concedes my fetish for this substance
Of your trade. And I had planned to prove
Your views of me correct at even every chance
Encounter. But you surprised me. And the store which
Had shown promise until you came, arose
Like a child gone wild when company comes or a witch
At Hallowe’en. The floor, just swept and mopped
Was persuaded by the northlight to deny it.
The muddy rag floor rugs hunched and flopped
Away from the tears in the linoleum that I wanted
Then to hide. The drapes that I had pleated
In clear orchid and peach feverishly flaunted
Their greasiest folds like a banner.
The books who had been my friends, retreated—
Became as shy as the proverbial poet in manner
And hid their better selves. All glow had been deleted
By the dirt. And I felt that you whose god is grace
Could find no semblance of it here. And unaware
That you were scrubbing, you scrubbed your hands.
Wrung and scrubbed your long white fingers. Scrubbed
Then as you smiled and I lowered my eyes from despair.
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